Time is like magic. You know in a magic show when the magician saws the box in half and the woman isn’t cut in half but she’s gone? Or the rabbit suddenly disappears after appearing? And the whole audience turns to each other and says where did she go or where’s the rabbit?
How often do we see someone we haven’t seen since he or she was a kid, or think of something that happened years ago and think “Wow where did all the time go?”.
I’m having a birthday in a couple of days and am smack dab in a sea of time. Floating on memories, riding waves of past events.
Turning 64 is both a shock to my system and a non event. 64 …like how the hell did that happen? It makes no sense and all the sense in the world.
Personally, I view it as the no perk birthday and wish I could just leap frog over the whole thing and be turning 65. At least there you get the big perk, Medicare.
64 is just the question, thank you, John, Paul, George and Ringo, will you still love me!
Here is the time thing in relation to this number that I’ve been dealing with in terms of how to articulate it. So here, let me give it a try:
It’s knowing your age, ok so me, I’m 64 in a few days , so let’s cut to it and say 64. I know it, I have the wrinkles to prove it, but inside I’m still the me I was at 24, 34, and 44…14 even. Not as far as knowing things and feeling things, dare I use the word wisdom, but in my me-ness. And when I stop and say I’m 64 it is weird. Like when and how did that huge leap happen from the 17 year old me getting shit-faced on rum cokes down in Greenwich Village thinking every dark haired guy walking in the door of the bar was Bob Dylan and he was going to fall in love with me, to this woman looking back at me in my bathroom mirror? What invisible time capsule took me from lying in my bed, frozen, afraid to move a muscle because my new born baby girl was asleep with her tiny head on my shoulder and I was afraid of waking her, to the other side of her queen sized bed in her studio apartment in Brooklyn Heights with her, 25 and all grown up, gently snoring like the lady she is, beside me. One moment I’m at the beach in Santa Barbara, begging, imploring my fast footed toddler to please stop running so I can please stop chasing her and have that beach moment I was hoping for with me reading my book and her making a nice sand castle right there where I could see her, next I’m asking her why she hasn’t gone to get birth control if she’s spending most nights in her boyfriend’s room at college.
You know what I mean, right? You stand there looking at your life or thinking about it, and inside you are still you. The you you were in your parent’s house ,or in high school ,or at your first rock concert. On some level, even though you know you are here, these are your things, this is your own home, and those are the dogs you just fed this morning, it’s all somewhat strange and almost inconceivable that you got here.
I’ll blink and be 65. We all know how fast it goes by and that this year will fly by and boom, hopefully the answer to John, Paul, George, and Ringo’s snappy tune will be a big YES and I’ll arrive safe and sound at the perk year, which I’m very excited about. The Medicare? Not really, but how lovely to cut down on those bills. This is my trick. About two years before turning one of the big numbers, I pick out my big number present.
Oh yes. I’m a gift ‘Ho of the highest order. The way dogs love bones,or macho guys love football, I just love presents. And the big numbers usually fetch a big present so I pick it out early and then start getting excited about turning that age so I can get it! And I’m so happy the wait is over and I’ve got my pressie that I don’t even care how old I am! It’s great.
The gift for my 65th is a girl’s trip with my two daughters which I am extremely excited about. We’ve never really had a trip with just the three of us except for once when they were little and I took them on a car trip that was so bad the highlight was going to an International House of Pancakes so that trip doesn’t count!
Not saying where we are going, but I will say it’s going to be fabulous!
Speaking of fabulous…Chris Rock. Now there is a birthday present I could and totally would love. A lunch, dinner, coffee with Chris Rock. Let’s get real, I’d love a whole night with Chris Rock!
But… A) my husband wouldn’t be happy, and B) no way in hell would he want any part of that action!
So let’s just keep my 64 year old skinny white ass outta the picture and get back to how great the guy is.
The man is beyond fine. He’s funny, fine and wise. The thing he said while hosting some award show several years ago still cracks me up. Even though I can’t remember which award show it was, he said,
“Oh and JLo’s here. She had to take two limos. One for her and one for her ass! “He tossed it out with that naughty boy smile and I fell out of my chair!
Anyway, he is on the cover of this week‘s New York Magazine and inside is a terrific interview by Frank Rich that shows what a smart and thoughtful a dude he is.
If I could copy it all here for you I would but I can’t so treat yourself to a copy:
OK well now that two big fat cats are outta the bag, my age and my fantasy man, maybe I’ll mosey on for now before my husband takes all my technical devices away until I learn how to behave! (never!)
I will leave you with the link to the Hollywood Reporter essay that Chris (we can drop last names now, whatddya think!) wrote that’s right on the money.
And…my sharing and caring for this edition is this; 3 wonderful places to make Holiday ( or any day ) donations .
2ND AME CHURCH
My friend Rev. John Cager, Pastor of 2nd AME Church just started a shelter in his church so the homeless can come in out of the cold. He can use blankets and bedding and cash to buy food. So if you would like to help him keep some people sheltered this winter as your Holiday good deed, he’d appreciate it.
Donations can be made to:
2ND AME CHURCH
(mark for use in the Wet Weather Shelter Program)
5500 S Hoover St, Los Angeles, CA 90037
Global Foundation for Humanity
My friend other friend, Jacqueline, started a school for girls in India that is educating girls who would otherwise not be getting an education. If you would like to make a Holiday donation the girls would truly appreciate it!
Donations can be sent to:
Global Foundation for Humanity
35 Cunningham Drive
Monroe, NY 10950
Phone: (845) 781-4395
Fax: (845) 783-7541
link on to learn more
And if you are in the mood to donate for dogs ( which I truly understand) I’ve got a friend for that as well! My pal, Helen, has a non profit called Creature Kind and she and all of her homeless dogs would also love some Holiday help
Tax-Deductible Donations to help our four-legged friends:
P.O Box 112
Topanga, CA 90290
or via pay pal at https://www.facebook.com/creatureKIND
What we are wearing? Big smiles and our kindness coats. Remember holidays can be hard on our friends without family, so include them when you can.
Happy Holidays and have a truly Blessed New Year!
As always, with love